Looking for how to control emotion or methods for controlling emotions? then you came to the right place.
When we cannot grasp the cause of some negative emotions, they can cause great problems, stress and depression in our lives. In this respect, we should try to be aware of our emotions and not allow our emotions to direct our actions.
There are some methods to overcome negative emotions in order to be happier, healthier and successful.
In this article, we will consider the issue of emotion control.
Methods of Controlling Emotions
Here are the methods for controlling emotions.
A. Focusing on Mind and Body
1. Note the Emotions Out of Control
The first step to having control over your emotions is to notice the moment when emotions get out of control. You should ask yourself how this moment feels physically and spiritually, and you should catch this moment. When you realize that emotions act on your own, you should try to stay calm and think logically.
For example, when you move with your emotions, your heart rate accelerates, your hands tremble and your face becomes red.
You also have difficulty focusing mentally, feel nervous and can’t get your head together.
To combat these situations, you must remain calm and notice the situation. So, instead of denying the situation, you should accept it.
2. Breathe Deep and Calm
When your emotions get out of control, breathing again gets out of control. This is a situation caused by stress and anxiety. To take control of your breath, take a deep breath several times and sit in a suitable place. If there are techniques that you know about breathing, it is also useful to apply them.
For example, place one hand on your stomach and the other on your chest. Breathe slowly and deeply through your nose and count to 2 or 4.
Feel your lungs are filled with air and hold your breath for 1-2 seconds. Then slowly release this air in your mouth. Breathing this type of deep breathing 6 to 10 times a minute will contribute to your calm.
3. Be Aware of the Five Senses
When you lose control of your emotions, you will also break with time and space. You won’t know where you are for a moment. To prevent this, it can be very useful to try to recognize the items around you and activate your five senses.
For example, you can save your mind from the vortex it enters by talking aloud at that time. Or you can look around and describe what you see with sound. You can turn on music or radio to come to yourself. Describing the environment in which you have 5 senses active at the moment can also help you focus.
“I’m in my room right now. There is a red rug on the floor. There is a blue abstract painting on the wall. There is a smell of coffee in the kitchen. When I open the window, the smell of coal comes from the outside. My body temperature is normal, but my toes are a little colder. ”
With such descriptions, you can prevent your mind from getting lost and increase your awareness of the moment you live.
Speaking, speaking to one, working all five senses; It is a good way to restore emotion control.
4. Release Your Muscles and Joints
When your emotions take you captive, you probably won’t notice changes in your body. However, in such moments, you may be tightening your muscles and joints. Your palm can be bored without you noticing.
When you are more conscious about emotion control, you can easily notice such situations. It will be very useful to relax your muscles and control your mind. If you think that your muscles contract and your shoulder is held for no reason, it is also very good to consult a doctor.
5. Imagine Yourself in a Calm and Safe Place
Try to think of where you feel the most peaceful and happy. Close your eyes and visualize that moment, that place. Be aware of your breathing. Try to feel this peace in your body as you go on a mental journey.
Beach, forest, mosque, and sea can be your dream destination. Think of a place that really gives you peace. Consider the sounds there. Think about what you see, what you touch, the smell of that place.
If you have a negative feeling during this animation, consider this feeling as an object. For example, consider stress and unhappiness as a pebble stone and imagine that you are throwing this stone towards the sea at the seaside that you dream of peacefully.
6. Prepare a Clipboard or Notebook with Good Things for You
Prepare a notebook or clipboard with beautiful memories, good words, happy photos with friends and family. In this book, write down what you are happy with your existence. Write words that inspire you. When you feel that negative emotions are coming, try to calm down and calm down by looking at this notebook or clipboard. You can also upload a folder with such beautiful things to your mobile phone.
B. Facing Emotions:
1. Identify Your Emotions
Knowing what emotion you have is critical to emotion control. It is important to take a deep breath several times and think about how it feels at that moment, even if it is painful. You need to analyze why this emotion is caused to yourself, whether it has taken over your emotions to cover up another situation.
For example, analyze why the exam you will take next week makes you stressful. Maybe this exam will affect your future, maybe you want to take this exam higher to affect your family. Perhaps you think that your family loving you in a subconscious way is focused on your success.
Describing and detecting emotions is a skill that can be gained. Remember, no emotion is “wrong.” Trying to feel nothing can do you more harm. It is in your interest to accept that the feeling you are in is natural.
Finding the true cause behind your emotions helps you a lot in terms of emotion control. When you reach this consciousness, you learn that emotions do not have a dominant effect on you.
2. Don’t Deny Your Feelings
Denying emotions does not make them disappear. Although it seems to disappear for a moment, it reappears in a short time. However, trying to reflect on these feelings for 15-20 minutes daily may be a more permanent solution.
For example, you can write your feelings in your diary or blog; you can pour out a friend.
Feel free to cry if you need to cry.
If you feel pain, pain due to negative emotions in your body, you can do sports, yoga, meditation or a short walk.
3. Consider Solution Suggestions
Sometimes your emotions may get out of control because you don’t know how to control the current situation. In such a situation, you can dive into emotions and enter into an impenetrable process. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to break this vicious circle.
“Why am I so unlucky?
“Why is none of my work going well?
Instead of asking such questions, you can get advice from an experienced person, talk to your teacher or your boss, and get help from an expert psychologist.
Admitting that something is out of your control is also a good way to eliminate the negative mood you are in. Yes, there are many things in life that develop beyond our knowledge and willpower. These things may reflect us positively or negatively. In this case, we are only responsible for ourselves.
4. Prepare a Conscious Plan
When you are trying to deal with negative emotions, make sure that this is a conscious choice. So you have to act with your will to eliminate the problem. Decide how and why you want to resolve the situation and plan.
What kind of ethical values do you have?
What result do you want to achieve from this situation?
What kind of action is closer to giving you the result you want?
For example, if someone insults you, you will not do anything, you will respond, tell this person to stop or fight. How would you behave in such a situation? How do you get out of this process without harming the values you believe?
C. Making Healthy Reactions to Emotions
1. Do Not Immediately Defend
Going into defense immediately causes both emotions to get out of control and you will be perceived as “overly emotional”. When you are stressed, angry, you can go on defense, but you should listen to others’ thoughts and consider constructive criticism. Listening to other people’s thoughts reduces your threat perception and eliminates your unnecessary defense mechanism.
Examples of defense mechanisms are to refuse to listen to negative feedback, find excuses for failure, blame others, smile sarcastically when talking to others, and make sarcastic comments.
2. Take Precautions Against Emotions
When we say taking precautions against emotions, we actually mean the following: People, places, things, smells can cause you to wake up to certain emotions. It is necessary to take precautions against such triggering things.
For example, you broke up with your beloved and her perfume was covered in all your clothes. In order to circumvent this separation, you can eliminate this fragrance by washing all the laundry in your home. So every time you open your wardrobe, you won’t find yourself sad and unhappy.
Or let’s say you are doing group work. However, your group friends are not enthusiastic and enthusiastic, they are constantly goygoy. In this case, ask your teacher to change your group instead of yelling and calling people.
As it seems quite possible to get rid of falling into negative hands by taking proactive, that is, preventive measures.
3. Ignore Negative People
If a person says things that will make you unhappy, if you are playing with your nerves, keep calm against this person. When you don’t care about this person, this person gives up his movement and leaves you alone.
If you feel the need to say something, “These movements are annoying me, if you do so, don’t be in touch with me again.” you can say something like.
4. Do Different Things
If you feel that negative emotions are taking over, stop for a moment and give the opposite of your reaction to that feeling normally. So apply yourself to the reverse psychology. If this method brings a positive result, try to get this habit.
For example, if you are overwhelmed with dishwashing, get angry with your spouse, start washing the dishes yourself and ask your partner for help. Plug in a neutral style of doing it.
D. Expressing Emotions:
1. Express Your Feelings Directly and Confidently
Learning to be clear while communicating is an important method to control emotions. Things that bother you or that you do not have time to “no” and you must learn to say it clearly.
For example, if a friend invites you to go out on Saturday evening: “Thank you for thinking about me. But these days, I don’t mind crowded and noisy environments. Let’s have coffee on weekdays after work, okay? ” You might say. This type of style not only allows you to express your feelings, but also makes your relationships healthy.
2. Accusations of others
To blame and scold others indicates that you are weak in terms of emotion control. Therefore, try to avoid accusing phrases.
“You don’t care about me a bit.” Instead, you said, “I will call you. I’m really sorry you didn’t call. ” You might say.
Try to avoid expressions that contain anticipation such as “You should have done so, you should do like this”. Nobody is perfect. Try to learn to accept people as they are.
Apply it for yourself too. For example, if you fail an exam that you study hard;
Instead of saying “I should have worked harder,” “I did my best.” Try to experience the peace of mind of saying. Of course, for such an approach, you must have really worked hard.
3. Listen to Different Views
No situation should be evaluated from a unilateral perspective. It is important to listen to other people’s thoughts, understand their perspectives and establish a natural dialogue. Listening actively, calms your emotions and puts you in a healthier thought atmosphere.
“So what do you think about it, Melike?”
E. Gaining Calming Habits:
1. Exercise Regularly
Playing sports is great in terms of physical and mental health. Swimming, running, walking, playing tennis, playing basketball, lifting weights, yoga and meditation have very positive effects on your mental health. Sports, you can also get rid of negative emotions with an emphasis on healthy eating.
2. Improve Your Different Senses
To appreciate the beauty around you, try to look around with more constructive and receptive eyes. Spend more time on what gives you peace of mind.
For example, listen to calm music. Spend time with cats and dogs that are delighted. In the evening, head out on the half-hour walk. When you are overwhelmed, take a warm or hot shower. Sometimes treat yourself to a delicious and stylish meal.
3. Touch Yourself
People touch, are creatures that need touch. Loving touches ensure that the hormone oxytocin is secreted, which is spiritually refreshing.
In this respect, try to hug your loved ones. You can also try to calm yourself by touching. Put your hand on your heart and think about your heartbeat and every beat means life. Wrap your face with your hands, show yourself love.
Meditation anxiety is a fantastic way to cope with depression and unhappiness. Regularly returning to your inner world makes it easier to control your emotions and thoughts. For this, you can write to meditation classes and get help from a meditating friend.
5. Repeat Words That Empower You
Again, it is useful to repeat some of the words that give you strength, inspiration and motivation in order to establish your peace of mind. Such words are called “mantras”. These words will relieve you when you feel weak.
“These days will also pass.”
“I will not be the prisoner of my feelings.”
“Even though I have a little difficulty now, I’m still fine.”
“I have the power to overcome them.”
F. Making Long-Term Effort:
1. Get Down to the Origin of Unrest
If you have noticed that you are under a wave of chronic negative emotions, try to identify the main event that caused this condition. Review your personal history.
When was the last time you had a fight?
How did the fights in your family affect you as a child?
How did your life change after the divorce?
Did you get used to your new workplace?
Why can’t your circle of friends satisfy you?
2. Keep a Journal
Keeping a diary of your feelings is a good way to detect freshness. What kind of events led to what kind of emotion you can learn in detail by keeping a daily basis.
Consider the events you experienced while keeping a diary, the effects of these events on you, how these events used to create different feelings in your past, how you look at the issue today. Confront a kind of your own and accounting structure.
3. Learn to Look At The Glass Full
More optimistic and wants to be a constructive human time and effort. However, once the habit of being more optimistic and constructive has been gained, you will now approach things more flexibly. You won’t experience sudden breaks.
You should focus on how to best perform under current conditions and possibilities, leaving aside the excuse-making approach.
This is not something that can happen in a day, but it is quite possible to have a more balanced world of emotions by approaching situations constructively.
4. Get Help If Needed
Sometimes, even if you try to control your emotions and get rid of negative emotions, you may still not be successful on your own. In such a case, it would be a very correct decision to contact a physician or psychologist. People with expertise in mental health can give you the most accurate advice and can give you directions that will lead you to a more correct way.